Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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