the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Randomize
