This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
