Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
