i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
