Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
