Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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