Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
