it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Randomize