ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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