More tranny stories later!
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
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