He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
They have beer where we have blood.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
