I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
