Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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