I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Operation Purity has been aborted
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
