Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize