I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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