Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
