Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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