if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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