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  I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life

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• STOP SUBMITTING THESE TEXTS, DAD

  Submitted by jnyhammerstix on Jul 4, 12 at 2:53pm

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• for fuck sake stop listing the things that have been inside you

  Submitted by nunubeest on Jul 4, 12 at 5:06pm

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• What she's trying to say is.. "Bitch, I'm better than you. Suck it."

  Submitted by mlock08 on Jul 4, 12 at 2:26pm

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• Wow a Brazilian? That sounds like alot

  Submitted by krazybobblehead on Jul 4, 12 at 10:39pm

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• Mail order husband for a drunk cat lady? Thought those came from morocco.

  Submitted by GA_Peach on Jul 4, 12 at 5:59pm

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