soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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