i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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