i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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