I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
This baby is an asshole
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Randomize
