No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
