a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
