Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
There's always time for handjobs
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize