I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
