Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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