Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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