just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
