It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
