Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
