It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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