I'm eating all of the evidence.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
