I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
