I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
