also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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