oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
