I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
