there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
A+ Viking dick
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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