P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
