brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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