we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
