she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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