Is it normal to miss your booty call?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Randomize
