There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
