that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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