We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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